day 44

[inflori]

[ His voice, even in his head, is tired. Exhausted and extremely irritated, even, with the petulance of a mind not yet fully awake. Petre was pulled from his comatose state just as suddenly as he fell into it, the stress of a broodmate being ripped from him having lifted from his symbiote. Now it's ready to keep going, but it hasn't given Petre the same courtesy just yet. He'll get there eventually. ]

( Why do you have to be so loud? )

[ ... All of you, he means. Ugh. ]

Comments

[wille]

[ Her attention on him is like a stage lightf flicked on in a pitch black theatre, with him alone on the stage. It's immediate and unrelenting. It's a firm grip on his wrist as if he's hanging over a ledge and she's the only one who can keep him from falling. But it's strange, how in all this, there's also a sense that it's her who needs saving. ]

( Petre! I knew it, you just needed rest, right? Stay there. I'm coming to find you. )

[inflori]

[ He'd been quietly resenting the lack of voices actually welcoming him back (>complains about something >complains when he doesn't get it), all while refusing to admit he'd been wondering if and when Misato would notice. Her focus, while expected (hoped for), is so sudden and overwhelming that it makes him feel ridiculously small.

He doesn't hate it. And he hates that. ]

( ... Not like I'll be hard to find. )

cries over my typo

[wille]

[ Boy, you're a difficult one to love and to please. Lucky for him, that's exactly the type of surrogate son she gravitates to with full intent, even if not with complete honesty to herself. There are many ways to deceive oneself, of course. ]

( That's not a bad thing. How are you feeling? Aside from cranky. )

[inflori]

[ !!! He's never cranky! Babies are cranky!!! ]

( Sore, I guess. This stupid thing in my head is weaker than I thought. )

[wille]

[ Petre, you're objectively a baby. ]

( I didn't think I'd miss your whining but here we are. )

[ But never mind that cause here she comes. She hasn't bothered to hide that she has to catch her breath from the sprint over or spare a few moments to compose herself. What would be the point? She rushes over to gather him into a hug, aggressive perhaps possessive, without bothering to hide her tears or put up her walls to conceal her mind. She misses him, it's clear. She was scared of losing him. She needed to believe her own proclamations that he wasn't gone forever, and this? This is just fuel to further her self delusion. ]

I knew you'd come back.

[inflori]

[ He resents that !!!!! ]

[ He cuts her off intentionally, ready to sulk and pretend he is neither irritated or offended at the use of that word - whining - but before he knows it, her arms are tightly wrapped around him and he can feel the breath shifting her body, in and out.

He knows aggressive, he knows possessive. He'd just never be able to express it like this, though. It's so -- ]

Are you crying?

[ Better to use that than admit that he's... touched, or whatever. It's too strange having feelings, stranger still to think anyone that isn't Angel could have them for him, and even she'd rejected his ignorant advances. To be actually loved or missed is a bit surreal. ]

[wille]

[ There's a lot to be said about how Misato seems to possess no inclination to conceal her emotional outbursts even when standing in the middle of NERV's multi-tiered command center. There's just as much to be said about how she never wipes her tears away, not even when she pulls back, a simple smile on her face, a forceful ruffle of his hair. But of course, you silly. ]

I thought I wouldn't get to say thank you for what you did back there.

[inflori]

[ He hates it. He thinks. He didn't hate it when it came from Angel, and maybe that's at the core of this feeling: that accepting Misato's bond for what it is might be some sort of betrayal, some way of replacing what she meant to him. He can't let that happen, he'll be forever attached to the siren who may never come back, that's a promise.

(A promise that will destroy him, if he chooses to keep it.)

At least her hand in his hair isn't as soft as his broodmate's had been. Angel never shed any tears. She suffered for him, sure, but - not like this. Not in such a human way. ]

... Well. I guess you thought wrong.

[ Though why anyone (Misato) would thank him remains a baffling, resentful mystery. ]

What now.

[wille]

It wouldn't be the first time I'm wrong.

[ Won't you look at that, it's Misato being honest about her mistakes, meaning it must be the equivalent of Christmas in her heart, or the ontological opposite of it. This time her tone is light, clearly relieved, as she withdraws her hand from his head. Her expression quickly turns mischievous, falling back into old, well-worn roles. ]

You slept through the entire celebration, silly. So I guess now we'll just scrounge and hope to find you some cake or something.

[inflori]

[ He's still reluctant to budge, emotionally, to accept any of the fun-loving warmth Misato has to offer. It's proving to be hard, though, and the effort shows in how he tenses his lips and twists them to the side, in true tsundere fashion.

Until she mentions cake. ]

What were you celebrating?

[wille]

[ Unfortunately for him, it seems acerbic and avoidant boys with a flirtatious dalliance with the trauma of solitude is precisely her type. He checks all the boxes, and she is made more persistent by his rejection as if it's some kind of conditioned response. He makes a poor attempt at a frown and, on cue, she reaches over to pinch his cheek. ]

Getting out alive, I suppose. You, us succeeding. Getting the prizes.

[ She crosses her arms, loose and yet guarded. ]

Well, it was also a bit sad. I guess you know why.

[inflori]

Yeah. I did all those things, didn't I.

[ It's no accident that he doesn't react to the last part. Sad doesn't work. ]

Did anyone else even care?

[wille]

Why? You're keeping a list?

[ And checking it twice, Santa? ]

Lexa helped me move you over. I'm sure Ilde cares.

[inflori]

[ Tsc! ]

No. Why would I keep a list. [ Why would you be silly enough to ask that, Petre. ] So Ilde didn't say anything?

[wille]

[ There's a smile on her face that's equal parts amused and sad, like seeing the semblance of an adult in a child's body. ]

Before we left for that ship, remember? Ilde talked to me to make sure I'd keep you safe.

[ Misato is loose with her facts when it suits her. ]

[inflori]

[ It strikes him as surprising, and he can't even think that he's touched because he doesn't know what that's like. His voice would rather spill that he doesn't need anyone to keep him safe, but at the same time... he wants to be thought of. He wants to matter. There's no Diana to keep him anchored, and the first substitute is gone, and he's splitting himself between three of them now: Ilde, Misato, Lexa. Each of them plays a different role. Each one of them keeps making him wonder what any of this is. ]

What did she say?

[wille]

She said--

[ Insert actual dramatic pause because ah, what can she tell him? That Ilde said she wanted Petre culled? That he could be useful if well-manipulated? Hardly complimentary. Misato reaches over to caress his face, but only to end the gesture with a pinch. ]

Not to do that to you cause you'll bite my hand off.

[inflori]

[ Yeah, don't tell him that. Nice distraction, Misato, you're an expert. ]

Stop! Damn!

[wille]

[ She barks out a laugh, head tipped back, the personification of a plague upon the idea of the yamato nadeshiko. ]

C'mon, stop asking silly questions so we can find something to eat.

[inflori]

[ And the personification of a demon cat perks its ears at the mention of food. What better way to distract him from being an awful plague upon

well, everything? ]

Like what?

[wille]

Like not people.

[ Remembering what Ilde said about the demon child . . . ]

Do you like coffee?

[inflori]

What the fuck, I've never eaten people on the ship.

[ He definitely has wanted to, but that's absolutely different, and therefore no one can criticize him. ]

I don't know, it's not like I drink it.

[ Does anyone really want to know what would happen if he did. ]

[wille]

Sometimes I wanna eat some people on the ship, so like, I can't blame you. [ Quick on its heels as if she can undo the damage: ] But you still shouldn't. Don't. Okay?

[ Speaking of coffee, she keeps walking through the winding hallways to find the alcove that serves as her room, a literal pigsty, though she seems to find no trouble locating a can of UCC brand coffee to toss his way. ]

[inflori]

[ Wow, Misato. That's. ]

You wanna eat people?

[ He thought he was the only one. Except for Nate, but he's gone... Could it be that he has found a true friend, at last? ]

... I thought you said coffee.

[ It's a can. There's no such thing as coffee in a can. ]

[wille]

--No! It's just an expression! NO!

[ Flashback to that horrifying scene of Petre swallowing an alien like it's slurpee. In case there's a chance he might miss her point, she comes over to grab him by the shoulders to stare into his eyes. Listen, child. ]

I don't eat people. You shouldn't eat people, but I know you-- need to, or whatever, so we'll find you people you can eat. Sometimes. Okay? But you can only eat those ones.