[It doesn't take long. Not because of the overwhelming flood of living, shifting information compressed into such a narrow space (the heat of Sam's fingers locked down over his eyes until all that's left is a tangled map of every breath, every atom, every beating heart framed within the depths of a billion stars, screaming static— ) but instead where it hooks into the thin flesh of his own memories, echoed back with sympathy through Sam's voice. His name. His name. Tears slick the underside of Sam's fingertips as he thrashes in panic, in outrage and something too muddied to possibly name, desperate to rip himself clean of the connection. Please—
Let him be a symbol again. Let him be unfeeling, uncaring, as cold and dead as his forefathers in spite of his own beating heart. He reaches for Snoke, for Cathaway, for Ilde, Hux or the Darkling, chokes out a strangled noise that never clears the base of his throat like something drowning; he can't feel them beyond the barrier of Sam's inhuman mind.
Was this what it felt like?
Hand outstretched, searching for a glimpse of the child he'd left behind, only to know the heat of a saber slipped cruelly between his ribs— to find the unblinking stare of someone else entirely. He can feel it. All of it. Parallels played out in pale seconds. Knees giving in, eyes rolling back as they drift shut, breathing gone shallow and slack. A mercy.]
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Let him be a symbol again. Let him be unfeeling, uncaring, as cold and dead as his forefathers in spite of his own beating heart. He reaches for Snoke, for Cathaway, for Ilde, Hux or the Darkling, chokes out a strangled noise that never clears the base of his throat like something drowning; he can't feel them beyond the barrier of Sam's inhuman mind.
Was this what it felt like?
Hand outstretched, searching for a glimpse of the child he'd left behind, only to know the heat of a saber slipped cruelly between his ribs— to find the unblinking stare of someone else entirely. He can feel it. All of it. Parallels played out in pale seconds. Knees giving in, eyes rolling back as they drift shut, breathing gone shallow and slack. A mercy.]