( that could wait, that could wait, that could wait...
clarke recites the mantra with increasing regularity, and each time the thought passes through the hazy shallows of her thoughts, it becomes a little less effective at battening down the desire to bolt from the tent. objectively, she knows who has passed; not one of her friends, not one of her broodmates — someone else, someone she didn't know. but that doesn't mean she's not still scared of what could have befallen those she did. and as she sits, arms wrapped around asuka's sobbing form, the crushing wave of grief rolls off the other girl and all those beyond the privacy of the tent; pour over clarke until she's begun to shake, and tears have begun to well in the corners of her eyes.
she could wait, she could wait, she — can't.
she has to move, she has to go. despite how bitterly wrong it feels to abandon the other girl in this, her hour of need, clarke physically cannot sit still anymore. she has to know how badly lexa was injured, if bellamy was bleeding. she has to make sure they're all alright, and she's unraveling her arms from the blanketed crying mass to her side. )
Asuka, I'm sorry. ( she means it, too, for all the good that does for this apology that ultimately feels flat. clarke's eyes are wet, and her nose is stuffed. she sniffs. ) I'm so, so sorry, but I have to —
( words fail her for a moment, but the girl is perceptive; use to abandonment. she'd get it. clarke wants to cry for her inability to be in two places at once. )
wrap this soon?
clarke recites the mantra with increasing regularity, and each time the thought passes through the hazy shallows of her thoughts, it becomes a little less effective at battening down the desire to bolt from the tent. objectively, she knows who has passed; not one of her friends, not one of her broodmates — someone else, someone she didn't know. but that doesn't mean she's not still scared of what could have befallen those she did. and as she sits, arms wrapped around asuka's sobbing form, the crushing wave of grief rolls off the other girl and all those beyond the privacy of the tent; pour over clarke until she's begun to shake, and tears have begun to well in the corners of her eyes.
she could wait, she could wait, she — can't.
she has to move, she has to go. despite how bitterly wrong it feels to abandon the other girl in this, her hour of need, clarke physically cannot sit still anymore. she has to know how badly lexa was injured, if bellamy was bleeding. she has to make sure they're all alright, and she's unraveling her arms from the blanketed crying mass to her side. )
Asuka, I'm sorry. ( she means it, too, for all the good that does for this apology that ultimately feels flat. clarke's eyes are wet, and her nose is stuffed. she sniffs. ) I'm so, so sorry, but I have to —
( words fail her for a moment, but the girl is perceptive; use to abandonment. she'd get it. clarke wants to cry for her inability to be in two places at once. )
I need to know they're okay.