[ That's not an easy question for her to answer. There's no cut and dry explanation for why she's adjusted relatively quickly to all of this, but she feels like she still has to try. He's not dealing well with everything that's happening to them, and she wants to help somehow. If she can. So she shrugs slightly and wears an apologetic expression. ]

I'm not really the best example for that. I was a new vampire at the same time as being a new Host, so all the weirdness just kind of got jumbled together. [ Not helpful. And it's just served to bring up her own negative emotions from that experience. ]

I guess I don't mind as much because I'm hoping that it'll help people realize that I don't want to hurt them. That I'm not a monster.

[ Even though she has that debate every day when she wakes up. When she watches the others eat their breakfasts. When she smells the blood rushing under their skin and has to fight off her own hunger -- the way she has to now with Seth, the craving rising up out of nowhere before she can shove it back down, abruptly shifting a few inches to the side, turning to face forward again. Swallowing heavily, she bows her head slightly, but her hair is tucked back and doesn't fall to hide her expression. Not that he won't be able to feel her shame, fear, and intense anxiety before she tries to cover it all up with thoughts of something else.

She chooses an explanation for some of the tension he might be feeling within the brood, if he took the time to notice it. ]

It hasn't quite worked out that way. Lakshmi tried to kill me when we first woke up on the Station. Not that she would have succeeded, the symbiotes won't let us hurt each other, but she wanted to. [ And that still hurts. ]