[backdated to day 44: mental link]

[adamance]

[Withholding information had not been Lexa's goal, but she had wanted to thoroughly research what she could before she brought it to the rest of the Nest. For that reason, Lexa has been busy, but has been careful not to reveal what she has in hand until she's ready. Even as she prepares to speak to the Nest, she's not completely prepared, and there's a sense of agitation over this.

By now, she already knows the results of them following Ven, but they haven't yet received the information they require. Why they didn't take the opportunity is bothersome in and of itself, but there is little that she can change about that. It's about moving forward, and it's not as if she has the fullest degree of faith in the Nest. Nothing changes that.]

( Today, I'd like to speak to you all about the results of our meeting with Mind Life. The conversations we had prior to this meeting with the hacker group that privately contacted us may have been accurate on this front. ) [She deliberates revealing what she told them about their goals, but decides against it: Mind Life's desperation to remain stagnant and inactive is worrisome, to say the least.] ( They have their hearts in the right place, but not their minds. I'd say it's ironic given the name of their organization, but not surprising. They prefer passive communication over action. Their idealism may be worthwhile, but they have little help to offer because they refuse to make a show of any aggression.

As a result, our only boon from them is a list of people who they deem trustworthy. Or untrustworthy. Unsurprisingly, Saffit is on the list of unsavory individuals. She doubts that even the untrustworthy men could be behind the bombings, but we may come to see her perspective as one of denial given her unwillingness to act.

I've done the beginning search into many of the other individuals named, but I cannot be as thorough as any of our technical people. Trust that I will not be handing over this list lightly, and that the contents of it will not be available to everyone in the Nest. I would rather prevent any reactionary behavior as a result of what Sheena Frey chose to write down. ) [If anything, she refuses to share everything on the list with the Nest. She may give names, or an idea of whether or not someone is on the list, but she doesn't want any of the Hosts to set out on a crusade.

Especially when she can barely trust Sheena's judgment.]

Comments

[exhuxperation]

( What do you expect withholding information will achieve? )

[unsea]

( Of the names Sheena Frey has provided - how many might you say are names we would be familiar with?

Saffit excluded. I have plans to discern his level of involvement. )

[ he's among those Not Pleased by her decision to keep information from them and he's biting that back for now. ]

[adamance]

( Caution. We have too many plans to see through before we lose focus. How those pan out may or may not affect this list, and how we approach it. )

[She has other reasons: there are individuals she would rather keep from seeing the list and acting on it to seem like they accomplished something here. (Ilde, who rests. And Kylo Ren, for more obvious reasons.) Should it fall into their hands, she doesn't think any organization they've achieved will go well.

There are others, of course, like Mara Jade who acts knowledgeably when she knows nothing.]

( And I do not trust her judgment. She didn't lie to us, but that isn't necessarily the truth, either. ) [Someone else may be more inclined because of their mission. But idealism doesn't make someone wise.]

[adamance]

( Two. For which reason, I hope you can understand why the list may not be of much use right now. )

[Besides, she is willing to hand over the list, but not to everyone. The Darkling would currently count as someone she wouldn't trust as she hasn't yet discerned his motivations just yet.]

[deployed]

( Does Mind Life even have the resources for a direct attack? )

[adamance]

( No, even an attack done with words rather than violence.

But with us, they could. Quite easily.

That is not how they hope to protect the AI of this world. )

[Lexa likely feels as if she is loudly condemning them.

That's because she is.]

[deployed]

[ immediately thinks of clarke at her most frustrating, baby deer phase. ]

( There's a chance that could change. Eventually. )

[ not that they have time to wait. bellamy understands that. ]

( What are they hoping? They counter bombings with rhetoric? )

[adamance]

( We would have to give them cause to. Putting them on the attack may prove risky. ) [She has thoughts on this. Staging an attack against them that isn't unlike the other attacks could do it, but even then, they may be stubborn. There are too many elements of uncertainty.]

( Rhetoric ... and peace. They feel it is the only way to enact change. They're foolish. ) [Peace has its upsides, but not when you are literally fighting a losing battle.]

[deployed]

( They aren't at peace. )

[ This is a genuinely difficult conversation for Bellamy to navigate. It wasn't so long ago that he was arguing this same point with Clarke, with Octavia in braids and war paint barring the door. He worries that he's treading that same ground, heading into the wrong direction. ]

( If the attacks continue, they might not get a choice. We might not have to instigate anything. )

[ Nevermind that Bellamy's balking at the idea of acting the instigator. ]

[adamance]

( Just as I asked for caution with regards to Ilde's proposed concert, I believe the same will be true here. What is an option does not always have to be taken, but acknowledging it is important. )

[What Bellamy does not know is that before Clarke, she would have taken the risk. The people of this world would not matter to her. She has changed a great deal, and she can sense it now. In a way, she treats the Nest as her people, even if she is loath to admit it.]

( I'm hesitant to share the list for a list of reasons, but most importantly, I do not yet trust her judgment. We'll have cause to think differently soon. )

[headinjuries]

( You sure about keeping it back? )

[ He's seen it, naturally. He was there. But she's holding onto it, and like hell does he remember all those names. ]

( I mean...secrets in this place. They don't always work so well. )

[decommission]

( Reactionary behavior? )

[ Considering that conversation they had a while back he can, uh, kind of see who what she's referring to. But even so, he agrees with Sam. ]

[exhuxperation]

( And if any of those names come to light during those plans? You mention that they may affect the list, but the reverse can be just as true.

I'd rather not place full trust in her judgement either, but withholding information that could potentially be used is ill advised. )

[ Onto other matters: ]

( Regardless of certain individuals you may want to keep it from– this group does not function like a normal military unit, Lexa. They will not just take orders when pointed in a direction. You'll be asked why, where, and how. Just as any free-thinking individual would.

Moreover, we're all mentally linked. Distrust against any of the others serves only to cripple you. )

[ He's been learning that the hard way. For several years, with Ren. And now for a few months, with the rest of them. ]

[adamance]

( For now. If I had reason to give them over quickly and to everyone, I would. Trust that, Sam. )

[Hint: she is not lying.]

[adamance]

( People take pride in surprising things. )

[If anything, her altercation with Kylo Ren tells her that much.]

[decommission]

( I get being cautious and all, but it's always gonna be hard to connect the dots when people are holding back some of them.

Did something happen? )

[adamance]

[If there were some way to mentally represent someone digging their heels in, it would be apparent here. This happens for two reasons: first, Hux chooses to speak of trusting the Nest as a whole, which she sees little reason for. Second, she doesn't like being contradicted. It's a side effect of being the leader of her people for so long; no one is meant to disagree with her so boldly.

It's tempting to lash out, to use a number of things against him, but she does not. She withholds it, even if the mental link among broodmates makes it impossible to hide that trickling temptation in the back of her mind, distantly, like a whisper that can be narrowed in on should the listener want to hear what's being said.]

( I did not say I intended to keep all the information to myself. I merely said I would not be handing it over lightly. Without caution.

Trusting the brood blindly is one step closer to handing yourself over to it. Is that what you want, General Hux? ) [This is where Lexa ultimately settles: she decides to seek out information, all to see where he stands. Lexa recalls the pain and agony of losing Anakin, both in him being severed away and in Ahsoka's loss, but it has made her more stubborn about maintaining her own identity (especially since Ahsoka's outright rejection of her outreached hand).

Lexa could see the use for a coalition among the Hosts, but not one that thinks as one, losing itself to a greater power.]

[adamance]

( There is little we can do with these names at the moment, unless more information surfaces. We have no cause to give it weight. And Sheena Frey proved very disappointing. )

[To Lexa, she was a dead end.

But she is not answering that second question, even if she feels as if she supplied enough words that it may be perceived as if she did.]

[exhuxperation]

( I understood what you said. You still made mention of keeping information to yourself in order to prevent reactionary results. Not only is this distrust in a higher degree, but the respect and command you've striven to create becomes meaningless. You've announced your intentions here, but now how can I or any of the others believe that you'll give us the whole story next time? I realize this may sound contradictory, but it would be as a result of your blatantly manipulative behavior.

In that vein, I would trust the rest of the brood with my life if this is the path you choose to take. While I do not agree with many of the people here, I respect their opinions and outlooks as any strategist worth their salt would. To directly liken it to a military body– we have small numbers and cannot afford to have anyone in the dark. The head must always be aware of the limbs and vice-versa.

Stepping closer to becoming part of something does not immediately equate losing oneself to it. Having been a commander, you should know this. )

[decommission]

( How can you be so sure there's nothing we can do with them yet? )

[ They've been operating independently, someone might recognize something that she doesn't. ]

( This is a bad call. )

[adamance]

( If anyone is morally offended by me withholding information, then they are foolish to be surprised by it. )

[Her people would expect nothing less of her. She can declare it as a strength, because it is known as a strength. But then, she has shown a tendency of kicking men off buildings to remind them of how little she values their lives.

Being forthright has served her well.]

( But I believe that the guilt you feel over what you've done to that system is blinding you here, General. I won't be on the receiving end of your reparations to the Nest. )

[What had been a trickle of temptation has become more than that, dragged forward so she can wield it like a knife.]

( You are foolish to believe that this situation is anything like what we've come from. ) [She doesn't think he believes it, and it sounds more like she's calling out the lie in what she sees as a morality crusade.

As it is, as someone who believes in giving her mind and body to the next Commander, she knows the difference here. And there is a difference, beginning with one solitary fact: John Murphy and Bellamy Blake aside, these are not her people. They are nothing more than a means to an end, and should they prove to be a burden, then they can be cast aside.]

[adamance]

( Interestingly enough, everyone has taken the opportunity to call it that without asking to see the list. I'm not withholding it from everyone. )

[There are those she trusts and those she doesn't. Anyone who pretends the Nest functions any differently is blind and foolish in her opinion; if they do feel it's that way, then they have allowed themselves to become purposefully ignorant to their surroundings, or they have given too much of themselves way.

Lexa refuses to give ground on that.]

[frakkincylons]

( You sure that's the best idea? Keeping secrets in a hivemind? )

[ it also maybe concerns him a little that this seems like a decision lexa and lexa only made. there's of course good reasons for secrecy at times, but they come with the price of separation and distrust from the rest of a body, especially when it comes from a commanding seat, but that's the thing. lexa is a commander, but not commander of the nest. sam's not sure how he feels about that one way or another, but he's near certain some within this nest would object.

it might be asking for more trouble than she's looking for. ]

( Are the names worth what's gonna piss people off about being kept in the dark? )

[wrackful]

( You know, if you're going to keep crap from people, it's usually a better idea not to tell them. Unless this is some grounder thing like we're all meant to fight each other to the death for it now. )

[snaphiss]

( You're withholding information, and we can request it so you can decide whether or not to graciously release it? )

( So you're judgemental and insecure? )