Hello, it's me

[perroquet]

CHARACTERS: EVERYONE
WHERE: Hyrypia - The Swept Manor Grounds
WHEN: Morning of day 12
SUMMARY: Rudely calling like 80% of the Nest out for being cagey.
WARNINGS: Will update as necessary.



(Hello! Am I doing this right? Hello!!! Good morning!!)

[ The red sun is hardly up, it's barely after breakfast, some of the members of the nest may still be sleeping - and this one doesn't seem to mind. He noisily floods the network like a one-man-band who just won the lottery, his very thoughts musical and abrasively cheerful. ]

(It's been several long days since my young broodmate and I joined you in this dustbowl, but I have yet to meet all of you properly. I understand we're working covertly, but you're all quite cagey for being connected in the head, you know that?)

[ There's either a slight tone of vindication, as though he believes most have earned this morning call for being so standoffish. Or perhaps he's just being loud because he's inexperienced with the symbiote still. Possibly both. It's hard to tell through the band playing behind every word. ]

(Most of you don't know me yet, but I want to get to know every single one of you. Since we have another day here, I'd like to get started. Here, I'll go first-

My name is Gildor Helyanwe, and I'm a bard from Esterport. How are all of you? Well I hope, not getting too hot, learning to ride those constructs?)

[ The band stops. Crickets chirp, though hopefully not for long. If he's left hanging, he has no qualms over striking up the mental orchestra next. ]

Comments

[perroquet]

(Hosts, incompatible? That seems the fault of the symbiote, not the hosts.

What a shame though. I am very sorry it's happened to your brood...) [ There is a weight in Gildor's thoughts, as they carry a sense of both sympathy and gratitude. He's glad to know this now, even if the subject is a heavy one. Though not as heavy for him as Bellamy, as he practices a mindfulness of living in the present.

Presently, there are no deaths or sleeping deaths to worry about. ]

(Does all of this weigh on your mind so much that it is always the first thing you mention when you meet a new host?)

[ His tone is not accusing - only curious, and tentatively worried. ]

[deployed]

( It's not always the first thing I mention. )

[ But it does, inevitably, weigh on Bellamy. After nearly losing the Darkling, after living months with the loss of Rey and Bruce, Bellamy can't quite get away from the sense of missing a piece of him. It compounds the inescapable, gnawing reality of Octavia's absence. Her face rises vividly to the surface of his mind as he continues. ]

( It's one of the things I wish I'd known sooner. I didn't realize it could happen until it did. )

[ And it was not the best surprise, obviously. ]

[perroquet]

(I understand. Thank you for making it known to me.)

[ He puts the prior feelings of gratitude into words, hoping to lift some of that weight from the both of them. It's a lost cause though, as Bellamy seems to slip further away from their present, his mind dredging up what Gildor can only assume are memories of loved ones lost.

While he has similar meteorites, the form they take in Bellamy's mind is practically alien to Gildor. An image hovers over the black edges of his mind, and he observes it curiously. ]

(What is this now? Or... who? Is that right?)

[ He only assumes he's free to ask since it is so vivid, but not in a way he knows anything to be vivid. There is no touch or sound or smell to this memory, and his mind can't seem to comprehend it without those things. ]

[deployed]

[ Even though Gildor is not the first to ask directly about fragments of memories he's seen lingering in Bellamy's mind, the question takes Bellamy by surprise. There's a stutter of hesitation before the fragment of Octavia blooms into something fuller, fleshing out and crowding away the impression of Rey and Bruce. ]

( My sister. Octavia. )

[ Her name is infused with love. There's no point holding her back. ]

( She's not here. )

[ The last memory he has of her comes to mind: sweat and blood and lamp oil in the air, adrenaline thudding in his veins, voice thick, O, be careful. She hadn't said anything in return. They hadn't said good bye. Bellamy might never get the chance now. ]

wow the autocorrect in that last one was great, my b

[perroquet]

[ Like his first vision with Pidge, the woman takes form in Bellamy's mind in a way he can better understand. She's given voice and form, and while Gildor doesn't dare touch a memory so precious, he marvels at her the way one might at seeing a beautiful painting for the first time. What makes her real isn't just Bellamy's other senses being added to her memory, but the love that surrounds her. ]

(Thank you for sharing her with me. I don't feel I know you well enough to deserve it.)

[ His thoughts continue to be black and shadow-like as they coil around Bellamy, but his intent doesn't seem to match their sinister appearance. On the contrary, he is full of gratitude, sadness, and a gentle concern. ]

(Are you doing alright here, Bellamy?)

no worries boo

[deployed]

[ There are aspects of his past Bellamy should keep to himself, but it has never occurred to him to keep Octavia a secret. She is a part of him. Her face is never far from his thoughts. It would be easier to stop breathing than to omit Octavia from his mind. But Bellamy can appreciate Gildor's assessment of their acquaintance. Despite being linked, they are still strangers. But that has always been a complication of the Nest. Bellamy doesn't concern himself with it in the moment, already trying to think how to answer the question Gildor is putting to him. ]

( I'm fine, ) [ The words come slow, confused. ] ( Why? )

[ Why ask? Bellamy has never had the luxury of not being alright. Entertaining the idea of it still seems like a waste. ]

[perroquet]

(Just wondering. You seem to have some troubling things on your mind.)

[ Gentle concern continues to flow from his end of the connection, resonating with the with the sweet bass of cello music. The tempo slows as he focuses on creating a more soothing shared atmosphere. ]

(I'm not sure what kind of place you come from, but it's alright to allow your thoughts some peace every once in a while, you know. If you'd like some help with that I can try to be of service.)

[deployed]

( My thoughts can be peaceful when we make it back to the Station. )

[ Which would improve the odds of Bellamy relaxing, but it was hard to let go of all the things causing concern. He had spent months on the ground with nothing but survival in the forefront of his mind. He hasn't acclimated to the idea that it doesn't necessarily have to be that way. ]

( Are you going to offer to teach me to meditate too? )

[ Assuming that's the only way anyone relaxes, thanks Adra. ]

[perroquet]

(Meditation is one way to go about it. Personally I find it quite boring and tend to fall asleep.)

[ Gildor wasn't really thinking of suggesting it - he knows from experience a quiet mind isn't for everyone, and not the only path to inner peace. He's made aware again that he really doesn't know Bellamy, so he's not sure what to suggest even though he'd like to help. So he asks what he suspects Bellamy hasn't asked himself in a while- ]

(What would you do if you had nothing at all to worry about for one hour?) [ And if that's too broad, he adds- ] (Did you have any hobbies before? Any beloved skills to hone?)

[deployed]

[ Amusement flickers in Bellamy's mind, but ebbs away as he tries to consider the question and comes up empty handed. ]

( On the Station, I read what I can understand from the library. And I spend time in the training wing. )

[ But apart from that ??????? ]

( I don't think any of us have been able to completely forget our worries for an hour. )

[ That's not what he was asked, but it's the best he can do. ]

[perroquet]

(The days here are long. Taking just one hour aside for yourself will help you achieve more in every other hour of the day.)

[ He seems confident in this belief, but the options Bellamy has given are a bit limited in their current location. The tempo of his mind increases again as he puzzles through his own ideas of how to help. ]

(Hmm.. I believe the only reading material around is the mission brief, and whatever religious texts the Collector scattered about the tents.)

[ He recalls nearly tripping over one. After that he had found every last one in the tent and banished them to a neat stack in a corner where they wouldn't stub any toes. ]

(I'm not sure how interesting they are, but if you can read them that may be something... actually, if you can read them to me that would help my cover. Apparently my disguise is that of a holy man.)

[deployed]

[ It's...possibly a favor. Or Gildor's offer registers to Bellamy as one. It's thankfully framed as a necessity, which makes it easier for Bellamy to allow. Like skimming through the books they had managed to find at Naerhouse, reading in service of the Mission while they're on this planet is more excusable than the idea of reading for pleasure. Rhan's face flashes in his mind, discomfort and skepticism following, before Bellamy's thoughts circle back around to what Gildor has proposed. ]

( I'd do that for you, ) [ Bellamy agrees, wariness relegated to an undercurrent in hi mind. ] ( Some of them I can parse. Kaji was having some luck with them too. )

[ Gildor isn't asking for help with reading to seek out information, but Bellamy gives the kneejerk advice of who would be best suited to the job. ]

( We can start whenever you want. Lexa and Murphy don't need me to play bodyguard all the time. )

[perroquet]

(Thank you! Perhaps tonight if you'd like? I've heard reading before sleep helps ease the mind.)

[ He wouldn't know from reading, but when he was younger and read to, he used to sleep soundly. Now he sleeps more out of exhaustion than anything, and late into the morning if he's not careful.

He considers the suggestion a bit longer as though fine tuning it and realizing it's not perfect. ]

(We'll have to try and find you something besides a chore for me, though. I'll work on it.)

[ And by work on it, he means getting to know Bellamy. He can't come up with a good hobby for him without knowing him. ]

[deployed]

[ The care Gildor is extending to him is different than anything Bellamy experienced. Those he keeps closest don't think to prioritize hobbies; the kind of respite they bring is rarely considered a necessity. Confusion laces along the bond between them, but denial doesn't follow. ]

( In the meantime, I'll bring a book to your tent. )

[ Gildor will not be the first person Bellamy's read to sleep. Octavia comes to mind first (she will always come to Bellamy's mind first) but Murphy's face rises second; the memory is recent, and it is pulled back quickly. ]

( I'll see you then. )