[ OPEN ] Hot Springs Episode!

[shri]

CHARACTERS: EVERYONE
WHERE: The Second Flight
WHEN: DAY :022
SUMMARY: The Sauna!
WARNINGS: Nekkid times.

[ A few hours after the murder, she hasn't blown the ship up, and here they are. Another knock knock on everyone's brain: ]

( For those of you that are interested - I have secured us a place at the Sauna. Free for us to be use without interruption from outsiders.

You are to be clean before you come in. )

[ Maybe you're here because she bullied you, maybe you want to soak - maybe you're the poor bastard that is standing guard at the door. Either way, welcome to the Suana, have fun. Or don't. ]

Comments

[sistershoggoth]

( Nobody casually does morphine. )

[ But the real question is: is it worth it to her to be a big enough hypocrite to get up someone's ass about drug use after all the drugs she's used. ]

[raw]

( I did. I was careful. Precise. Same amount every time, never too close together.

Normally I wouldn't take it two days in a row, but this stuff is different. )

[sistershoggoth]

[ Ah jesus. ]

( If you think compulsively documenting your use doesn't make you an addict you don't get what addiction is. )

[ A big... sigh... ]

( Look, I don't care, man. I've been the junkiest junkie to ever hit the junk, I don't have any room to judge. Shit, maybe I should do some morphine so I don't crawl out of my fucking skin during this shitty ass mission. Then people'd stop bitching at me about drinking. )

[raw]

[ Going to try real hard to ignore that very true statement about his addiction. ]

( I've only got this last pill. Then I have to get Kavinsky to make more. If I can work out how he wants to get paid. )

[ Otherwise he would absolutely share. ]

[sistershoggoth]

[ Egh. Kavinsky. She wrinkles her nose. ]

( That's your deal. I don't want to play that game. )

[ Maybe he reminded her too much of herself. The manipulative uncaring junkie bitch who just used and used and used and hurt everyone around her. ]

[raw]

( The Kavinsky game? )

[ Curiosity tinging his thoughts; without any internet there's no way to get info unless you deep dive into someone else's brain, a different kind of hack. ]

( I mean, he's just a kid. )

[sistershoggoth]

( The junkie psychobitch game. Been there, done that. You guys don't like me drunk, wait until you see me real fucked up. )

[raw]

[ Huh. He kind of, mentally slots that into his Annie file. ]

( You do rehab and shit? )

[sistershoggoth]

( No, that'd be giving me way too much credit. )

[ A sigh. It is a really long story. And she doesn't want to dump it at Elliot, actually. So she tries to figure out how to abbreviate and also avoid follow up questions. ]

( Some shit happened. And the drugs stopped doing the job. So I had to try to, like, better my life and shit instead. And now I'm here so who gives a shit. )

[raw]

( Being here is the number fucking one reason to do some drugs. )

[ New arrivals. Always so melodramatic. ]

[sistershoggoth]

( Yeah, yeah, I know. )

[ She's not arguing, and the lack of ability to justify against his assertion is giving her a headache. Addiction is always finding ways to justify itself. She was drinking with justified reasons. That she needed to mellow out, stop being so restless and hurt and angry because it was going to hurt the others and let the stupid cat out of the stupid bag.

All she knows is that adding more chemicals isn't going to help her keep control. A knife's edge of justification, that if she keeps control, denies one over the other, she's playing by some kind of rule. Just like him and his measured doses. It's all a fucking illusion.

She feels a little sick, aching to feel good, feel distant, to be released from the responsibility of herself. The self-pity that came with giving in was its own kind of drug. ]

( But shut the fuck up. Seriously. I can't. )

[raw]

[ Her restraint makes him deeply uncomfortable — probably because it highlights his own lack of same, and he genuinely likes to think he's not an addict, that he doesn't let that shitty human need control him. Drugs are a tool.

But at the same time, he's too chill to push her harder, wouldn't forgive himself if he tried. ]

( Sure. )

[ But the conversation, at least on this occasion, is DOA. ]