station72 | [ OPEN ] Hot Springs Episode!

[Giving up is a loaded pair of words no matter the situation. An old, worn-quieter part of Murphy still bristles at them, pride and belligerence wanting to rise and fight against the implication. They don't make it so far, now, but having them tugged on still sparks some irritation. He shrugs, aggressive irreverence in the face of it.]

Figured I'd avoid ruining everyone's good time with me falling and drowning.

[There's no cost in saying as much to Bellamy. He already knows Murphy can't swim.]

It's not any deeper than the shallow end of the pool on the Station.

[ And it wasn't so long ago that Murphy had crouched on the side of the pool, watching Bellamy try to relax enough to float. The memory drifts through his mind as he looks at Murphy's face. ]

Try it. I'll come in with you.

[ If there was danger, Bellamy's assuming it's more likely to come from other sources than the pools themselves. He had carried his knife into the sauna for a reason.

But even with that threat looming, it hadn't occurred to Bellamy to pass up the opportunity. He'd gotten too used to having access to running water. Sweating in the heat underneath layers and layers of fabric was trying Bellamy's patience. ]

[It not being any deeper than the shallow end of the pool on the station gets a flat look from Murphy. He'd realised that already. But:]

Yeah, because that worked so well for you.

[Bellamy's flailing attempts at swimming are as much at the forefront of his mind as they are in Bellamy's, a pretty clear example of what he does not want to end up doing. But he has to wonder how insistent Bellamy's going to be about it. If they're going to have another argument with him trying to leave and Bellamy dragging him back, right here, in front of everyone with only one towel between them.

He also doesn't really want to give up.]

Fine. [Resigned, begrudging, as if Bellamy had just spent ten minutes persuading him into it rather than just seven words. He gestures back the way Bellamy had come.] Lead the way.

[ Bellamy hadn't been expecting Murphy to agree so quickly. The presence of one towel doesn't occur to him until he tips his head and start walking, at which point it's really just too late to do anything about it. ]

This way. There's some smaller pool deeper in.

[ If Bellamy can't reassure Murphy that he's not going to flail around in the water he can at last prevent him from having an audience while he gets acclimated. He heads deeper in, finding the small pool he'd just left and tipping his head toward it. ]

You want me to get in first?

[ It's a little teasing. Murphy probably won't appreciate it. ]

[Murphy hadn't really known what to make of their being hot water pools on the ship in the first place. Bellamy leads him in, past a few of the larger spaces, following a network of interlinked streams and even some artificial waterfalls, and the understanding for why this place is here, on a flying ship, continues to elude him. Concordia had held pockets of extravagance, Shril had been exuberant waste and noise, but it feels like this one thing goes way beyond any unnecessary luxury he'd witnessed at either.

Still, he follows Bellamy, taking it all in even as his eyes continually stray back to the lines of the other man's back. When they stop, it's in the mock up of a small cave. More dimly lit than the other spaces, private. Bellamy's clothes are in a pile to one side, hilt of his knife at ready access, and the whole thing says plenty to Bellamy's frame of mind. Murphy doesn't say as much, though, choosing instead to roll his eyes at the question.]

I think I can manage.

[Eyeing the shining fish looping slow patterns in the water. It isn't like it's the water that scares him, as such. Just the fact of knowing he'd be helpless in it, if it were a little deeper. Knowing exactly what that helplessness felt like, sat in one tiny boat with no land in sight. At least he can see through to the bottom, here. There's no chance of giant man-eating monsters lurking.

He realises he's been standing staring at it for longer than he should have, finds himself shooting a glance at Bellamy that's almost wary, expecting it to be pointed out. But then he decides not to wait for that to happen. Giving himself no more room to hesitate, he unceremoniously walks to the fake rocks at the edge and slides down into the water.]

Edited 2017-11-25 22:23 (UTC)

[ As Murphy settles himself, Bellamy drops his own towel and eases into the water after him. It's only marginally more comfortable than it had been to share a pool with Clarke. Bellamy's not any less aware of their nudity. But at least he and Murphy were already on speaking terms. The amount of baggage they're carrying is less. That makes something of a difference. ]

I didn't think being here was a good idea, [ Bellamy says, confessing to what Murphy likely already knows. ] But it's nice. I'll give Lakshmi that.

[ This kind of luxury still didn't sit well with Bellamy. Maybe Lakshmi has rubbed off on him (a troubling idea in its own right) but even with the fish, Bellamy doesn't completely object to being here.

His thoughts stray again to the scattering of scars across Murphy's skin as he slouches into the water. They aren't completely obscured. There's more of them than Bellamy has. Some of them are his fault too. That thought weighs heavily on him, though he tries his best to keep it to himself. ]

Edited 2017-11-25 23:39 (UTC)

[There are more fake rocks in the water, arranged around in the right kind of spots to sit. Murphy picks one, settling back into the warmth, the feeling of the water surrounding him. It's weird. He remembers being weightless, those few moments in the dropship before they hit atmosphere. He hadn't unbuckled, floated around to experience it full body like Finn had, but the sensation feels similar.]

Yeah. [The enveloping heat's nice. The smell of the water, sound of it, the dim lighting. Maybe a little too quiet for him, but he thinks he can enjoy it for the moment.] Pretty crazy to have in a ship though, right? They must seriously love their water.

[It has to be something natural to them, somewhere, he thinks, stretching out one leg to nudge at the glowing fish with his foot. They haven't seen anything like it on the planet yet, but for them to be this attached, it had to exist somewhere. The fish darts away, out of reach, and he looks up to find Bellamy's gaze almost heavy on him.]

I'm not going to just slide under and drown, man. [Immediate, because that's what it had to be. Bellamy taking his role of lifeguard a little too seriously.] You can stop staring.

Edited 2017-11-26 02:09 (UTC)

[ The culture of their hosts is a mystery. Lexa has paid more attention to it than Bellamy has. He hasn't prevailed upon her to share her insights with him. It seems insignificant in the long run. They'll be on this planet until they succeed or until they need to destroy it. Bellamy doesn't need to foster any attachments that will make the latter more difficult. ]

I know you aren't.

[ Mostly. ]

I hadn't seen them. The scars.

[ Truthfully, he hadn't been trying to see them. Murphy had returned and Bellamy had been so angry. He hadn't wanted to let himself see what his actions had wrought, let alone consider making room for Murphy in the camp. He touches two fingers to the marks on Murphy's shoulders, illustrating his point while he assesses the damage. ]

[The focus of Bellamy's attention, the comment and the touch on his skin are all so unexpected that Murphy doesn't even have the mind to flinch back from any of it. Instead he can only look at him, dumb for a moment. The idea that Bellamy hadn't seen them at all doesn't seem right, but he thinks back and can't see a time when they weren't otherwise busy. Except, perhaps, when Bellamy had seen them before they healed.

He looks at Bellamy's face and thinks that has to be what he's thinking of. The dropship, when the grounders had sent him back to infect the camp. Bellamy had been nothing but anger, terrifying in it. But now Bellamy's fingers are two points of heat on his skin, and the bitterness that would have him easily throwing that memory back in his face doesn't rise. Instead the corner of his mouth just pulls, flat, maybe a little dull.]

Grounders seriously love their torture.

[A dry echo of his previous comment. He lifts his left arm out of the water, holding his elbow up to point at the faint scarring there.]

Except this one. That was a sea monster.

[ Bellamy's fingers don't lift from the raised mark on Murphy's skin. Grounders love their torture, Murphy says, and Bellamy's mind supplies a very immediate example: Raven tied to a pole, screaming as Indra slowly dragged a knife across her stomach.

When Murphy came back to them, he was so caked in mud and dried blood that it had been hard to tell exactly what damage had been done. Bellamy hadn't wanted to find out. He can see it now, faded but still visible. Even as he'd bowed to Clarke's logic and cast Murphy out, he'd still been sending him away to die. It was dumb luck that grounders had thought he'd been useful and sent him back, just like it was dumb luck he hadn't killed Bellamy in the dropship when he'd returned.

He reaches across Murphy to take his elbow and press his thumb over the scar. It's different. ]

A sea monster, [ Bellamy says dryly, because of course. Why not? ] I didn't know you went out on the water.

[ And clearly it hadn't gone well. But neither had Bellamy's trip out to Luna's rig. Their people didn't have much luck on the sea, apparently. ]

[The memory of Raven comes through too clear. For a second it spins out, overlays with Pike tied to the bars in Polis' cells, Indra with the metal spike in her hand; with Raven's screams, echoing through Camp Jaha as he and Bellamy sat tied in the makeshift brig. Guilt curls heavy, rooted inextricably in those screams, in any memory of Raven. Murphy's mind flinches back, and he lets out a breath, hard, staring down at Bellamy's hand on his elbow for a long moment.]

Jaha's crazy quest for the City of Light.

[It's the first thing he can think of to say. To just tell the story, try to move away from what had spilled out of Bellamy's head.]

We thought we'd hit a dead end at the water, but there was this drone that flew off out over it, so we all climbed in this crappy wooden boat and rowed out. It got dark. We finally got sight of land, but something knocks the boat and Richards falls in. I tried to grab him, but this thing just... [He lifts his other hand, an open, loose gesture. Lets it fall back into the water.] Ate him. Whole. Almost took my arm with him, except Jaha pulled me back.

[A beat, and his mouth tugs grim, bitter, a sharper hatred stirring behind his words.]

But then he pushed Craig in, so I wasn't feeling grateful about it for long.

[ When Jaha had come back, it had been assumed the people with him had died. Now Bellamy knew a piece of the story, but he was too far from Arkadia for it to matter. His thumb run along the scars on Murphy's elbow as he contemplates that. The images don't shake loose from Murphy's mind but the impressions the recitation evokes rise like smoke. Bellamy's breath catches, but he doesn't linger over the sensations. ]

He cared enough to keep you alive.

[ For whatever reason. Bellamy didn't understand why Jaha did anything, but Clarke might have if she were here. ]

Good thing for me, isn't it? If you hadn't come along when you did, I don't think I'd have made it.

[ No one had needed to explain what he was being brought to the top of the tower for. Torture and death were the only explanations. And Murphy had saved him from it, then helped them save the world apparently. ]

[The reaction comes immediate, spilling from his mind even if Murphy doesn't interrupt Bellamy to voice it: that Jaha can stick his care right up his ass, as far as he's concerned. All it had meant for him was seeing more people die, being trapped alone underground for three months, and having to deal directly with stopping the outward spreading consequences of Jaha's insanity.

But good thing for me, Bellamy calls it, frames it differently, and Murphy's stuck staring at him for a moment. He'd never considered it that way, himself as some central, necessary pin to what had happened. Bellamy puts it on his shoulders so readily, rubs his thumb over Murphy's skin, the two connecting like a wire plucked, humming. He's suddenly sharply aware of how close Bellamy is, how warm the water is, the rough of the calluses on Bellamy's hand where he's holding his elbow. His gaze drops to Bellamy's mouth, catches there so easily, and then--

He's smiling, incredulous, half a dry laugh in it.]

Come on, you and Clarke? [He lifts his elbow up out of Bellamy's grasp, lets his arm fall back in the water.] You would've figured something out.

[ Just like at the pool, Bellamy can feel Murphy noticing him. It knocks the breath out of him. It's the same sensation he'd had before he'd kissed Roma, or Gina, when the bottom of his stomach drops out and heat floods his system. Adrenaline spikes as the feedback loops between them.

But there's nowhere for it to go. Murphy pulls away and Bellamy's breath stutters. He licks his lips. He feels unsteady, but all he can do is slouch slightly in the water rather than betray how he feels like the world tipped a little as they glanced off such strong awareness of each other. ]

Not this time.

[ He'd promised Octavia it would be alright. But Bellamy still doesn't see a way out of that situation where one of them didn't die. ]

We were in a bad position. If you hadn't shown up with Indra and Pike, I'd probably have died.

[ Willfully ignoring that Clarke might have given up the passcode to save him. ]

[The feeling lingers like an echo, longer than it should or normally does. Murphy doesn't want to try and puzzle that out. He fixes his attention on the fish swimming looping patterns around each other on the other side of the pool, deliberately not looking at Bellamy as he waits it out.

At least, to a point. Talk of death is like a spear shot through him, ice cold and hooking his attention sharply back to Bellamy. The idea ALIE's soldiers had been about to drag him away for a nasty fate wasn't new - there was a reason why they'd stepped in when they did - but there's something that feels harsher about it now. A genuine squeeze of fear in his gut, looking at Bellamy's face, hearing the way he frames it so absolutely. That he would have died.

A piece of Murphy still can't believe that, though.]

But you think we can get out of this.

[Another absolute situation, every glimpse of a way out blocked off by another condition of their circumstances now. As far as Murphy can see, anyway - but that's the point.]

[ Murphy's fear rebounds as easily as the crackle of his earlier attentions had. Bellamy can't stave off a shiver. The urge to reach for Murphy's elbow rises and fades away as the shared sensation passes. He focuses on hope instead, rather than the dread he'd felt as he'd thrashed in the guards grip. ]

Yes. I do.

[ He won't let go of that until he's pinned down as hopelessly as he had been in the ground levels of Polis. It's just not an option. Bellamy won't let himself. ]

I'm going to get us out of here.

[ Though as far as Bellamy could tell, doing that meant winning this war. It's a tall order, but he's been up against impossible odds before. All isn't lost yet. ]

[There was a time when Bellamy's bravery had just been a thin layer over a deeper pit of weakness. Murphy looks at him now, the certainty he speaks with, and wonders how much of that's still true. Some of it's avoidance, he knows it has to be, Bellamy unable to accept the idea he might never see Octavia again. But time would answer that, one way or another. Murphy doesn't need to hurt them both, again, trying to force Bellamy to give up on hope.]

You know I'm not going to be able to believe that until I see it.

[It's a steady, open admission, nothing sharp or defensive in how Murphy says it. It's just a fact. Right here, now, in the middle of this mission, he can't believe they're ever going home.]

[ It doesn't sound like an accusation. Bellamy recognizes Murphy's words for what they are: an explanation. It's not a denial. It's a challenge, something for Bellamy to dig in against and push towards their impossible escape. ]

I know.

[ And he should have known it when he'd said it first, but in the midst of that argument it had been hard to stay measured in response. ]

I'll say I told you so when we figure it all out.

[It's that thread of understand again. The one somehow he and Bellamy always seemed to come back to. Maybe they'd lost it for a while, or been too angry and hurting to pay attention to it. But Murphy can feel it again now, holding Bellamy's gaze. He nods.

Then he looks away, mouth pressing down at the corners.]

Guess I'll have to let you.

[ OPEN ] Hot Springs Episode!

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