station72 | mental link, v important questions;

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mental link, v important questions;

(Tell me, have any of you spoken to Cathaway within the last two months.)

[The newer Hosts are the most likely suspects, but perhaps through the link—

Perhaps he feels nothing not because of distance, but because she's chosen to keep him locked out. The possibility is a nagging itch at the base of his skull; he'd rather know for certain.]

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[ Wow! And now Petre is just offended. ]

( Why would it be weighing on her? What are we even talking about. )

(Did you not come running when Angel was unconscious and you felt entirely alone?)

[ And now he's more offended. ]

( You feel alone? )

[If he's being entirely honest?] (Always.)

[And never.]

(But she has to feel it, too, when we're all so far away from the Station, unable to reach her.)

[ Yes, yes, that's all very nice. ]

( You're supposed to have me.

You don't think I'm worth it. )

(You don't know what it was like.

To have someone there, always in your thoughts. Your mind. Through fear and anguish, when all others have abandoned you to wallow in your own suffering.)

[He dotes on you, Petre, and his thoughts project as much, but there's no denying how differently he views Cathaway.]

( Well, apparently she isn't there anymore, is she.

But I'm still here. )

[ Greed, envy, etc etc. ]

(And you think you can replace her.)

[Cruelty in the form of an offered challenge. Way to be, Ren.]

Why not? She's a replacement.

[P E T R E.]

(Enough—!!)

[ there's a shudder, unpleasant and aggravated, without fear. If Kylo is wondering how Petre dares to challenge him, Petre is responding in kind. ]

(Your place is at my side. That hasn't changed.

We won't speak about this again.)

( I just don't get why you care so much. )

[ Doesn't get that he should shut up about it, either. ]

(Legends aren't born, Petre.) [Anakin Skywalker didn't crawl through the sands of Tatooine as an infant, sowing fear and despair and leaving the galaxy quaking in his wake. He was fostered, taught, gifted with insight greater than that of his peers to deepen the divide.]

(Every Sith studies at the heels of a worthy Master— and when the time is right, surpasses them.)

[ He's still talking like she's the greatest thing ever. It still makes something ugly in Petre stir, and the symbiote with it. ]

( Don't you think you'd know if she wanted to be your Master. )

(Yes.)

[He can feel that discomfort level rising, sinking beneath his own skin. For once, he doesn't rise to meet it.]

(For a long time, she did - and once I return she will again.)

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( And -you- know what suffering is. )

[ can you feel her eyeroll. ]

(I've seen yours, if that's what you're referring to.)

[Cry more dirty scavenger.]

[ not rising to the bait, nope. c'mon you can do better than that, sith jr. ]

( 'To have someone always there in your thoughts, in your mind.' Is that what your Supreme Leader was like? Always in your thoughts? )

[ ...the way he made an appearance in hers. ]

[That— is a keen observation he wasn't wholly prepared to face. It shows in how his thoughts stall for a moment, in how they're slow to start again, lodged against the pull of some distant, now-dead false star, as if its lost gravity still has a hold on him somehow.

In a way, it does.]

(Yes.) [Coldness. Silence. A palpable reluctance to say more, when the truth would only come spilling out like blood from an open wound. Still, tight-lipped, muscles tensed in a false sense of control, at least like this he can pretend to feel nothing for it.]

[ like most of their interactions, she charges on ahead. recklessly, perhaps. ]

( That was how he knew you felt the pull of the Light; you were linked to him that strongly.

But you must have come to depend upon it, given your focus on the purveyors of the Nest. You miss it. )

[ what was it like? she wants to ask, being mind-linked in such a manner, more intimately and strongly than what exists between broodmates and hosts from the sound of it. ]

[He twitches, lip pulling sharply upwards at the corner, shoulders shifting higher by degrees. The symbiote transmits sight and smell, agony and bliss, but he's unsure whether or not she can detect how deftly she's struck him to the bone with her assumptions.

He doesn't really want to know regardless.

And then, something in him slips into place, hard and unyielding like a lock against every fragile, shivering response that threatens to come rushing to the surface. He isn't resolute, nor is he graceful, but his bout of stunned silence comes quickly to an end.]

(I don't miss anything.) [Snoke had been easy to know, his every want was always made clear, and it was a rhythm that Kylo Ren had been attuned to long before he took up the mantle of the Supreme Leader's apprentice. Cathaway is different: her methods, her needs— she delights in watching him lash out as much as she appreciates his ability to adapt. She is untamed. Predictable in her unpredictability and the foreignness of her needs. There's more grace to be found in it, less lust for power.

And why wouldn't there be? Already the clustered network of infinite timelines is woven across her slender fingers like the threaded charms she keeps wrapped around her. Snoke sought a legacy, a power to be harnessed and leashed to his name.

Cathaway needs neither: she already has it.]

( —I don't need it.)

[A lie, but only just.]

[ A lie, even as little of his mind as she knows yet; nearly every response he'd given to those answering his message has been nearly begging, seeking any sort of mention of him by the being called Cathaway. ]

( You don't need your Supreme Leader in your head, any longer?

...Or are you speaking of Cathaway? )

(He served his purpose, and gave me mine: dwelling on the connection that's been lost between us would only weaken me.)

[Better to cull that temptation at the root as he had with Han Solo: proactive cruelty ever standing as a better option than passive commitment - the final lesson Supreme Leader Snoke himself had imparted when he pressed Ren towards confrontation with desperation at his heels. After all, how many times had he questioned his own apprentice, grim features already twisted in suspicion and doubt? A ploy, a lesson— possibly even sincere hesitation, all of it necessary to ensure Ren never faltered on his path to greatness. For him, there would be no redemption—

But there would be victory.]

(Cathaway is stronger, knows more— her reach is endless, so much so that it would put Snoke to shame.

And she chose me.)

[ His response discomfits her: ] ( ...I don't understand why you would need that connection at -all-. )

[ What she says is a more blatant lie than the one he's tried to convince her of; she's wanted nothing more than to fill the loneliness in her own head for as long as she can remember. Now that she's part of the Nest and has the cacophony of thoughts in her head — some more appreciated than others — she can't help but make the comparison of just how very alone she was.

Would she choose to go back to her exile on Jakku, to be free of the Nest's influence for good? She's not entirely certain, but it doesn't stop her from making more assumptions about Ren, either way. ]

( You're weakened already, by your dependence on them. )